Wednesday, September 20, 2006

I'm back :)

Okay, I'm back! You know, when I hadn't written for a few days it seemed like such a huge task to get back to it and have to catch up, so for the last couple days although I wanted to write, it just seemed too big a job so I did what I'm best at and procrastinated. And I also got really sleepy really early last night and went to sleep on my couch at around 9 p.m. (and moved to my bed at midnight).

I bought a new little quote book the other day! I'm just absolutely addicted to quotes so anytime I see a really cute book of them and I look through it and see quotes that touch and inspire me, I just have to buy it! This one is called SoulHappy (and the "ul" part of "Soul" is pressed into the cover so it's there, but has no color so when you first see the book it looks like "So Happy" - how cool is that little double title!!

A quote that made me immediately think about why I love blogging and my wonderful blogger friends: The world connects not by molecules. It connects through ideas, hopes, faces, dreams, actions, stories, and memories. - Barrie Sanford Greiff (a psychiatrist and consultant)

And a few others that I like, because I feel like writing more happy quotes:

Every now and again take a good look at something not made with hands - a mountain, a star, the turn of a stream. There will come to you wisdom and patience and solace and, above all, the assurance that you are not alone in the world. - Sidney Lovett

At the heart of each of us, whatever our imperfections, there exists a silent pulse of perfect rhythm, which is absolutely individual and unique, and yet which connects us to everything else. - George Leonard

There is precious little hope to be got out of whatever keeps us industrious, but there is a chance for us whenever we cease work and become stargazers. - H.M. Tomlinson

Great ideas...come into the world as gently as doves...if we listen attentively, we shall hear, amid the uproar...a faint flutter of wings, the gentle stirring of life and hope. - Albert Camus

Okay, I feel good! I love my quotes - they relax me and give me such a feeling of peace and hope! Well, I'll give a quick little update on what I've been up to since I last wrote, which was I think last Wednesday night. I'm sure that after work on Thursday I went directly home and I think just read my book for awhile, and tried to work on a new template for awhile. Then on Friday I was feeling a little better because I had plans for the weekend and also because my mom and I finally made up - she wrote me a long email on Thursday afternoon and guessed that The German and I had gotten close again and then, analyzing a bunch of little things, she guessed that it had recently ended and that I had been the one to end it. Sometimes she so surprises me - not that she isn't smart because she's actually quite brilliant - but when she puts together a bunch of different things and just seems to know what's going on in my life I'm always a little surprised and impressed. So anyway though, when she called me on Friday morning we had a really good talk and she was very sweet and caring and motherly and it made me feel loved and a little protected, and like she was back on my side. And that's a good way to feel!

Anyway, work was fun on Friday because we didn't have much to do so all chatted quite a bit. And I also felt good because The Meat had told me how much everyone at work cares about me, and even though I know it, it was so good to hear and be reminded of. Apparently, The Queen was talking quite badly about The German and really upset with him for causing me more pain - that makes me just want to hug The Queen for caring so much, because he's usually just silly and doesn't show that side too often! Then TIC and I left early to go to her house and I helped her daughter set up their new computer and printer while TIC cooked her wonderful food, and then Florida and Asparagus came over and we all ate and then went to the movies and saw Hollywoodland, so the whole night was so fun!

On Saturday I slept late and then moved very slowly but eventually made it over to Freckles' house to watch the Michigan-Notre Dame game (and we were happy to see Michigan kick some serious ass!!!), although okay, we didn't actually watch much of the game because we were chatting most of the time. And I met her 8 1/2 month old little puppy Lola, and she was so so so incredibly cute and sweet and affectionate and cuddly and I just adored her!! She was shy and scared of me at first but she warmed up quickly and was soon giving me tons of little puppy kisses and I loved it! And I took so many cute pictures, too!!! I can't post most of them because they prominently feature Freckles, but here are a few that I've cropped and that show how adorable and perfect Lola is!





Isn't she so cute!?! I hung out with them into the evening and we watched the movie Matchstick Men which was wonderful, and then we ordered in some Thai and watched over half of the movie Two For the Money which was about the worst movie we'd ever seen so we turned it off. The whole day was very fun and I loved having something different and fun to do!

And then on Sunday, I only slept in a little and then I finally did all my millions of dirty dishes, and I cleaned every dirty thing in the kitchen. And I straightened up my living room a little. And I hung up three pictures in my dining room. And I looked at tons of pictures of Italy and started getting really excited to be going there in the near future! And that's all I did but somehow all that took most of the day. Oh, I also called MWFB and we talked for a long time and that was so much fun. I did get upset and sad and bothered and cried for awhile because of something The German said when he called me that day, but all that is a whole different story and for another day.

Then on Monday I went to work and went fishing with The Meat in the afternoon, and it was so relaxing and nice to be outside and spending time with The Meat. And after work I went to Trader Joe's and got some yummy stuff. Yesterday I went to work and briefly saw Florida and MWFB which was so fun, and after work I came home and didn't do much and then fell asleep. And tonight, SP came over for awhile and we had ourselves a bit of good fun and then talked for awhile, and since then I've been cuddling on and off with my babies and finally sitting down to write this!

I was going to start catching up on Gratitude Tuesday by doing my list of K words tonight, but it just turned to midnight and I'm feeling quite sleepy now, so that'll have to wait for tomorrow night. Oh, and Grey's Anatomy is on tomorrow and I'm a little excited about it! Yes, I feel like a dork saying that but I can't help it, I just am! And on my list of things to do tomorrow is to make an appointment with someone from one of the grad programs in social work so I can start figuring out whether it's something I want to pursue. Although if it isn't I think I'll be even more lost because that means I won't have even an idea of what I want to do and be when I really grow up. But I'm not going to get into all that right now because instead I'm going to go to wonderful sleep!

It feels good to be back and writing again! :)

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Written by Caterpillar :: 9/20/2006 11:59:00 PM :: ::


About Me

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly :: Anonymous

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly :: Buckminster Fuller



Name::Caterpillar
From::Chicago, United States

I'm a 30-year-old sometimes girl and sometimes woman living in Chicago. Over the past year I have faced my biggest demon and won, and as a result I have hope again for wonderful and fabulous things to happen! I'm still learning, growing and always trying to improve myself, but I absolutely love life and think I'm very close to becoming a real butterfly!!!
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How I Feel

"I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved."

"Desire is an entirely free sensation, loose in the air, vibrating, filling life with the will to have something..."

- Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

I Love Quotes!

In Loving Memory

Appreciate Yourself

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    Giardino del Piacere
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    A Window to my Soul
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    FUGGO
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    Tired of Men
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    Yes, And...
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    What Would Tyler Durden Do
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Recent Posts

    Jumping around blue post
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    Communication with my mom, and so so so much self-...
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    Musical Monday and Where I've Been :)
    A few pictures because I'm too sleepy to write!
    Some Serious Horniness and Gratitude Tuesday - the...
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    Late Gratitude Tuesday - the "I's"!
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Quotes That Touch and Inspire Me

♥ I think that the most beautiful women I've ever met are the ones that know who they are, have stories to tell, ideas to share, wisdom to impart and love the skin they're in. No one can love us as we love ourselves. No one can take away our beauty and our dignity when we own those things. To me confident=beautiful. :: CeeCi

♥ I'd been feeling a little blue (for no particular reason) when I began thinking about things like attention, age and body image. Suddenly, it washed over me. I see people looking at me and I see them reacting. I began thinking about the times I notice the attention and realized its the days I'm strutting, the days I'm open and holding my head up. This got me to thinking further. How I perceive myself is what I show to others...People don't realize it, but they show the world everything about themselves in the way they move and act, in the words they say and the way they say them. A little confidence can lead to a lot of confidence. :: CeeCi

♥ When we believe in ourselves the world is an entirely different place and our place in it feels right and happy and healthy. :: CeeCi

♥ Remember that something incredibly wonderful is always possible!

♥ There are moments that are wonderful, if you let them be.

♥ Being distrustful put me in a very lonely place, a place filled with doubt and hypervigilance. I'm grateful I've learned to trust again, because in learning to do it, I learned to trust myself. :: CeeCi

♥ We're all a work in progress. I believe we will be until the day our lives end. Why fight it? I love the changes I experience. Some are certainly easier and more enjoyable than others, yet I wouldn't stop the process for any thing in the world. :: CeeCi

♥ We may run, walk, stumble, drive, or fly, but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey, or miss the chance to see a rainbow on the way :: Gloria Gaither

♥ Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed :: Storm Jameson

♥ Love is everything. It is the reason we are here, and the wonder we take with us wherever we go.

♥ Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow :: Mary Anne Radmacher

♥ Just live in the moment, the moment you're in. Don't live two days from now. Don't live two hours in advance. Live now. And appreciate what you have now. Don't go any further. You have this moment. This second. Breathe it. Enjoy it. Live in it. :: Open Eyes

♥ Leap, and the net will appear.

♥ I've learnt that when we express our deepest feelings, even though we may stammer or be unable to find the right words, it always pays. It pays to be authentic.

♥ There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness :: Carl Jung

♥ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death :: Robert Fulghum

♥ You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. :: Ethel Barrymore

♥ Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. :: Carl Jung

♥ I will try to be as honest as I can with myself. That is all that is required of me. I'll keep admitting and opening my hidden box of fears, hurts and insecurities, again and again, until I know each one of them by their first name. :: Anu

♥ It struck me that there is amazing beauty everywhere. Does it matter where you are or who we're encountering? There is magic all around us. The fact that we're alive, the fact that we're living in this place and time. The fact that we've met the people we've met, all of it, every bit of it, only contributes to the wonder that is life. :: CeeCi

♥ No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the starts, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. :: Helen Keller

♥ Half of doing anything is believing that you can.

♥ Often God has to shut a door in our face, so that he can subsequently open the door through which he wants us to go. :: Catherine Marshall

♥ Even if it burns a little low at times, the secret of life is to always keep the flame of hope alive.

♥ The three grand essentials of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for.

♥ Some people will say that you are going the wrong way, when it is simply a way of your own.

♥ Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion. :: Martha Graham

♥ Life is a series of new beginnings, and in every ordinary moment there are a thousand miracles to behold.

♥ Don't let the approval of others determine your belief in yourself.

♥ When it's all said and done, when all the opinions have been uttered, preached, shouted, and shared, there is only one thing we can do: From this moment on...love.

♥ When you're stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin you need only to change one thing. :: Christina Baldwin

♥ You have to look for the joy. Look for the light of God that is hitting your life, and you will find sparkles you didn't know were there.

♥ Be the change you wish to see in the world... :: Gandhi

♥ Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

♥ We each have only a limited amount of time here. We have to do more with it - pay attention, explore, be open to all of life. Because we have only one chance, we have to make life seem longer than it really is. :: Viggo Mortensen

♥ Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. :: Cadet Maxim

♥ Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!

♥ What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? :: Unknown

♥ To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. :: David Viscott, M.D

♥ Right now it feels like:...no dream will ever remain unfulfilled...no desire will ever remain unanswered...no tear goes unnoticed and no effort wasted...the hills are alive and so are we...each moment is fresh and waiting to happen...and there will be garbage like situations all around...but it is upto us to light mud lamps in it...and glow in our own acceptance and appreciations... :: Anu

♥ I struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough at times. Usually, its because I'm pushing it too hard and have depleted my reserve. Yet, I know without a shadow of a doubt that no matter how heavy or thin, how young or old I appear to others it's what I feel on the inside that glows through. If I could give every person on this planet just one gift it would be the unwavering knowledge that they are beautiful and worthy of every good thing the universe holds. :: CeeCi

♥ It's easier to buy into the negative things we conjure about ourselves than the positive things. Knowing that is the first step towards changing the thoughts that keep us unhappy. With time moving forward, why stay trapped in the past? All we have is right here and right now, I intend to make the most of it! :: CeeCi