Friday, November 04, 2005

Fun weekend plans and other random stuff

Plans for the weekend: Tonight - nothing. I'll watch a movie and feed my addiction to Sudoku. Tomorrow - breakfast with Florida, dinner with Violet and Firecracker. Sunday - breakfast with The German. Also on the agenda sometime - a thorough cleaning of my apartment

I forgot to write this yesterday, but I was talking to Firecracker on Wednesday night, and she said she's bringing sparkling cider (if she can find it) for our dinner at Violet's on Saturday, so there wouldn't be any wine there to tempt me. Isn't that the nicest and sweetest and most wonderful thing! It made me so happy and I smile whenever I think of it! I love my friends!!!

Yesterday I got the hottest email! It was so fabulous and made me juice right up as well! And I've re-read it numerous times. I also just printed it out so I can have it with me over the weekend. It makes me so happy when I read it! And horny! And I'm never going to delete it.

Today, The Meat brought pictures of himself for us to look at, at various ages. They were fabulous! And he was hot! I love looking at pictures from when people are young!

Last night I was bad. And I'm feeling terrible and so pissed off at myself because of it. The idea came and the decision was made so fast. And once the decision is made in my mind, I don't want to call one of my friends to try to talk me out of it. So I bought a bottle of wine. And drank it all, and then went back out and bought another bottle and drank half of it before passing out on the couch. I'm just reporting, because of course this is my place to be honest and document things. I'm back on the wagon again as of today and determined to do better. And I'm really going to force myself to go to an AA meeting on Monday. It's right by my house, but the last two Mondays I've made excuses to not go. But this Monday I'll go.

On a completely different subject, James has decided to stop using his litter pan for the most part, and instead prefers using the bathtub. This has been going on now for the past three weeks. When I see him heading for the bathtub or in the bathtub, I pick him up and put him in the litter pan (which is in the bedroom). But every day there's a poopy in the tub. And I've seen him pee in there too, although he's quite considerate and pees right by the drain. Honestly, I don't mind so much, because it's easy enough to pick up his poopy and flush it down the toilet, and to wash down the pee I just turn on the water for a few seconds. But it's become a complete habit for him now. And his poopy smells, which is how I know before I even see the poopy that it's in the tub. BTW, I use the term "poopy" for the kittens, but I don't go around referring to people's shit as poopy. It's the cute kitten talk, as I say to James: "You went poopy in the shower again, you bad boy!" Anyway, I don't see how I'm going to get him to stop. I think he likes not having to step in the litter. Well, my mom did suggest shutting the bathroom door, so I'll try that for awhile and see if it will break him of the habit. But something tells me he'll start back up whenever the door is open. Little Emma is perfect, of course, so feminine and clean and always using the litter pan. Oh - this gives me a reason to put up pictures of my sweet babies!!! The first one is of James - I love when I get a picture of him looking pissy!! He was thinking "enough already with the fucking pictures, Mom!" And the second one is of my sweet little Emma - she's so cute!!!



Oh, and I'm going to be having sex sometime soon - yay! A plan is in the works with an old friend. I don't know when yet, but it'll be within the next couple weeks. And also, I'm getting myself a highly recommended Hitachi Magic Wand this weekend!! Last time I went to my local sex store (The Pleasure Chest) they were out, but it's been a month so I'm sure they'll be restocked now. I really need a new toy to play with!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Written by Caterpillar :: 11/04/2005 06:35:00 PM :: ::


About Me

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly :: Anonymous

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly :: Buckminster Fuller



Name::Caterpillar
From::Chicago, United States

I'm a 30-year-old sometimes girl and sometimes woman living in Chicago. Over the past year I have faced my biggest demon and won, and as a result I have hope again for wonderful and fabulous things to happen! I'm still learning, growing and always trying to improve myself, but I absolutely love life and think I'm very close to becoming a real butterfly!!!
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How I Feel

"I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved."

"Desire is an entirely free sensation, loose in the air, vibrating, filling life with the will to have something..."

- Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

I Love Quotes!

In Loving Memory

Appreciate Yourself

Fabulous Reads

    What Doesn't Kill You...
    Because I Said
    Emerald Eyes
    Giardino del Piacere
    Jody
    Smut & Steff
    A Window to my Soul
    Skydancer
    Good, Good Things
    FUGGO
    I am, therefore I date
    Tired of Men
    New York Moments
    Yes, And...
    The Notebook
    Action Girl

Inspiration

    DailyOM
    Living Life Inside Out

Beautiful Photography

    Coriolistic Anachronisms
    Chromasia daily photo
    Daily Dose of Imagery
    nyclondon's amazing photography

Harmless Fun

    Flash Earth
    Cute Overload
    Fugly Fun!
    What Would Tyler Durden Do
    The Superficial
    Blogthings Quizzes
    The Generator Blog

The News

    The Drudge Report
    Crooks and Liars

Recent Posts

    Guitar and Sex. Or preferably, Sex and Guitar.
    Hotness
    Let the games begin!!!
    Wet, wet, wet in my pants
    Happy Monday!
    White Sox parade and plans for the weekend
    Champion White Sox and Guitar Playin'
    Kittens and other little stories
    My new addiction
    Getting Head

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Quotes That Touch and Inspire Me

♥ I think that the most beautiful women I've ever met are the ones that know who they are, have stories to tell, ideas to share, wisdom to impart and love the skin they're in. No one can love us as we love ourselves. No one can take away our beauty and our dignity when we own those things. To me confident=beautiful. :: CeeCi

♥ I'd been feeling a little blue (for no particular reason) when I began thinking about things like attention, age and body image. Suddenly, it washed over me. I see people looking at me and I see them reacting. I began thinking about the times I notice the attention and realized its the days I'm strutting, the days I'm open and holding my head up. This got me to thinking further. How I perceive myself is what I show to others...People don't realize it, but they show the world everything about themselves in the way they move and act, in the words they say and the way they say them. A little confidence can lead to a lot of confidence. :: CeeCi

♥ When we believe in ourselves the world is an entirely different place and our place in it feels right and happy and healthy. :: CeeCi

♥ Remember that something incredibly wonderful is always possible!

♥ There are moments that are wonderful, if you let them be.

♥ Being distrustful put me in a very lonely place, a place filled with doubt and hypervigilance. I'm grateful I've learned to trust again, because in learning to do it, I learned to trust myself. :: CeeCi

♥ We're all a work in progress. I believe we will be until the day our lives end. Why fight it? I love the changes I experience. Some are certainly easier and more enjoyable than others, yet I wouldn't stop the process for any thing in the world. :: CeeCi

♥ We may run, walk, stumble, drive, or fly, but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey, or miss the chance to see a rainbow on the way :: Gloria Gaither

♥ Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed :: Storm Jameson

♥ Love is everything. It is the reason we are here, and the wonder we take with us wherever we go.

♥ Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow :: Mary Anne Radmacher

♥ Just live in the moment, the moment you're in. Don't live two days from now. Don't live two hours in advance. Live now. And appreciate what you have now. Don't go any further. You have this moment. This second. Breathe it. Enjoy it. Live in it. :: Open Eyes

♥ Leap, and the net will appear.

♥ I've learnt that when we express our deepest feelings, even though we may stammer or be unable to find the right words, it always pays. It pays to be authentic.

♥ There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness :: Carl Jung

♥ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death :: Robert Fulghum

♥ You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. :: Ethel Barrymore

♥ Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. :: Carl Jung

♥ I will try to be as honest as I can with myself. That is all that is required of me. I'll keep admitting and opening my hidden box of fears, hurts and insecurities, again and again, until I know each one of them by their first name. :: Anu

♥ It struck me that there is amazing beauty everywhere. Does it matter where you are or who we're encountering? There is magic all around us. The fact that we're alive, the fact that we're living in this place and time. The fact that we've met the people we've met, all of it, every bit of it, only contributes to the wonder that is life. :: CeeCi

♥ No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the starts, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. :: Helen Keller

♥ Half of doing anything is believing that you can.

♥ Often God has to shut a door in our face, so that he can subsequently open the door through which he wants us to go. :: Catherine Marshall

♥ Even if it burns a little low at times, the secret of life is to always keep the flame of hope alive.

♥ The three grand essentials of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for.

♥ Some people will say that you are going the wrong way, when it is simply a way of your own.

♥ Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion. :: Martha Graham

♥ Life is a series of new beginnings, and in every ordinary moment there are a thousand miracles to behold.

♥ Don't let the approval of others determine your belief in yourself.

♥ When it's all said and done, when all the opinions have been uttered, preached, shouted, and shared, there is only one thing we can do: From this moment on...love.

♥ When you're stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin you need only to change one thing. :: Christina Baldwin

♥ You have to look for the joy. Look for the light of God that is hitting your life, and you will find sparkles you didn't know were there.

♥ Be the change you wish to see in the world... :: Gandhi

♥ Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

♥ We each have only a limited amount of time here. We have to do more with it - pay attention, explore, be open to all of life. Because we have only one chance, we have to make life seem longer than it really is. :: Viggo Mortensen

♥ Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. :: Cadet Maxim

♥ Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!

♥ What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? :: Unknown

♥ To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. :: David Viscott, M.D

♥ Right now it feels like:...no dream will ever remain unfulfilled...no desire will ever remain unanswered...no tear goes unnoticed and no effort wasted...the hills are alive and so are we...each moment is fresh and waiting to happen...and there will be garbage like situations all around...but it is upto us to light mud lamps in it...and glow in our own acceptance and appreciations... :: Anu

♥ I struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough at times. Usually, its because I'm pushing it too hard and have depleted my reserve. Yet, I know without a shadow of a doubt that no matter how heavy or thin, how young or old I appear to others it's what I feel on the inside that glows through. If I could give every person on this planet just one gift it would be the unwavering knowledge that they are beautiful and worthy of every good thing the universe holds. :: CeeCi

♥ It's easier to buy into the negative things we conjure about ourselves than the positive things. Knowing that is the first step towards changing the thoughts that keep us unhappy. With time moving forward, why stay trapped in the past? All we have is right here and right now, I intend to make the most of it! :: CeeCi