The reason for my recent joy :)
Something really wonderful is happening right now, and I love it! It's amazing and exciting and unexpected and is making me feel so alive!
Yes, it's a guy, a man who's wonderful in so many ways and I'm just really discovering how many ways. And for some reason, despite all the feelings inside me and the thoughts in my head and the fact that for the past few days he's been a constant on my mind, I'm having trouble putting it all into words, getting all the things in my head organized enough to write about. Instead I feel that I'll be writing so disjointedly and not at all adequately expressing what I'm thinking and feeling.
[I've had this post ready to go for a couple hours now and have been just stuck on one thing: what to call this wonderful man. He has all these different facets to him and I don't want focus on just one and I'm just stuck! So for now I'm going to call him V because nothing else that I try to come up with satisfies me, and even calling him V doesn't satisfy me but if I don't use that, I'll sit here for the next five hours trying to think of something.]
So anyway, V is the guy who I was with from 4 p.m. on Tuesday until 10:30 a.m. on Wednesday. He doesn't live here and we live probably four hours apart by airplane. But in that short time, and actually within a couple seconds of meeting him, I felt things that I haven't felt in a very long time. It was amazing how drawn to him I was within seconds and it only grew, and usually it takes me awhile to like and or be attracted to someone and I also usually first see only the bad things about someone, probably on purpose. But with V, I got in the car and I was about instantly incredibly attracted to him, and as we talked I just liked him more and more - but it wasn't just a sexual thing, it was something more that I don't know exactly how to describe. I wanted to touch him, for him to touch me - even if was just our hands or a little touch on the leg. I wanted to be near him, I wanted to hold him and for him to hold me. This was all while still in the car and within minutes of our first meeting each other! I told him later that he was like a magnet because I felt pulled toward him instantaneously!
Before meeting, we had mostly just read each others' words, occasionally emailed, instant messaged recently, and we'd talked once on the phone for a long time and once the night before he came to Chicago. I wasn't at all expecting this, any of this. But it's so wonderful and amazing, and our 18 1/2 hours together were so incredible, and I feel so happy and excited from it all! I can understand now when people talk about there being an instant chemistry between two people, an instant magnetism.
I'll talk about our time together now! After he picked me up from work we drove up to my apartment - he was going to sleep on my couch and he'd bought groceries at Whole Foods because he was going to cook for me - yummy!!! In the car as I was feeling all these things I was trying to tell myself to slow down but even then my feelings were also saying in response to my logic, "I don't care, I want him to kiss me, I want his hands on me, I want him to fuck me" - yes, it was a little inner debate and my logic was not winning.
Okay so back to the story! We came inside and he took out a bag and he'd brought me presents!!! How sweet is that! He bought me his favorite kind and scent of candle - a Pacifica candle in Tunisian Jasmine scent - and for the rest of the night it followed us whereever we went and I've been burning it since he left, too, because the scent reminds me of him and our time together, and also cause it just smells so sweet and sensual and wonderful! Oh I love this: I just grabbed the little candle box and I have to write some of the things written on the box. First, just in regard to scent: "Natural and essential oils are carefully combined to celebrate fragrant beauty and its power to evoke a mood, a memory or a moment for one's soul." That's so beautiful and so true. And reminds me that I've tabbed some of the little things in a book I'm reading now regarding the power of our sense of smell - I'll write more on that soon. Okay, then on the back of the box it talks about Jasmine: "Jasmine, symbolizing grace, hope, love and happiness, has an incomparable fragrance and is one of the most valued materials in perfumery. Its oil is used as an aphrodisiac, to support pregnancy and facilitate in birth. In India, Jasmine is commonly called the "moonlight of the grove" since its white blooms release their heady fragrance only at night. This dreamy blend has the musky tea-like notes of a pure absolute." I love how that sounds!
Back to the story again! He also made me two CDs! It made me so happy that he'd thought of me and done something so sweet even before meeting me! I gave him a big hug and it felt so good and so right and we fit together so well! Oh yes, I haven't described him at all. Well first of all, one of my most important things is height and I'd never asked him how tall he was so I didn't know what to expect but as soon as I got in the car I could tell he was tall and I love that! And he has the perfect kind of body that I find the most attractive - tall and slender but not at all skinny, and with natural muscles, so he looks fabulous both in clothes and out of them! And even his outfit that he was wearing was my favorite kind on a guy - very cool jeans, black t-shirt, and such a cool-looking jacket that I don't know how to describe because I don't know the right words for fashion stuff. And he had a chain hanging from the side of his jeans to his wallet in his back pocket - I like what I view as little badass things like that!! :) And his face is so good looking - once again, I'm never good with describing faces but it's this perfect combo of cute and hot - and when he smiles he has a little dimple! And I also found that his lips are so soft and his bottom lip is full and I love feeling it on my lips and I just want to draw it in and suck on it all the time! Oh and okay, now I come to one of my favorite things - his hands!!! He has the most amazingly sexy hands ever!!! And also forearms, and I just LOVE hands and forearms! I took so many pictures of his hands because just seeing them is such an instant turn-on for me! He has three tattoos and I especially like the one on the top of one his forearms, it's beautifully done, looks so cool, and has meaning behind it - all of which makes it very cool. I think he may be a little embarrassed when he finds out how much I just went on and on and on about all this! But I can't help it, and this is my little diary so I get to talk about how sexy he is all I want! :)
Okay well he took a quick shower and I started playing the CDs he made for me, and we sat on the couch for just a little while and then we went to the kitchen and I finished cleaning the dishes that I hadn't been able to finish while he cooked up some very yummy appetizers for us - he made it look so easy and it was so good! He toasted little slices of bread and on half of them he put pieces of a red pepper that he roasted on the stove and then cooked in the oven, and on that he put goat cheese and then a little slice of lettuce - so pretty! And on the other half of the toasted bread he put a slice of tomato and a slice of good parmesean cheese and then a leaf of basil! Seriously, they looked so beautiful and both kinds tasted so wonderful and complex! Oh - and after he'd toasted the bread I turned around from the sink one of many times and he was drizzling olive oil on the bread, and I know this sounds so silly but he knows what he's doing and competence turns me on, and seeing him drizzle the olive oil in such a cool way with his finger over the top of it - well yes it turned me on even more!
So anyway, the whole time I was cleaning and he was cooking we were also talking and it was so nice and also felt so intimate with us both being in the kitchen and so close. I love cooking with someone! And then we took our candle and our plate of food to the living room and sat right next to each other on the couch, very cozy and I was very very cognizant of our legs touching and our every now and then other little touches. The sexual tension was amazing, at least for me! I couldn't be completely certain that he was into me, but I was incredibly and so so so strongly drawn to him (and it was the same exact way for him as I found out later). We took some pictures of the appetizers and he showed me how he takes very cool pictures where at the end of the exposure he moves the candle around. And he brought Pelligrino to drink and cut limes for us to put in it so even the drink seemed exotic and special - and I liked that a lot, having something cool to drink cause I sometimes miss that since I stopped drinking alcohol.
I'm getting so excited just writing this! When we started eating the appetizers I warned him that I'm a freak about my teeth and anything being stuck in them so told him I'd be asking him all the time to check my teeth for me. And then one of those times, after I'd finished my piece of toast, I asked him if anything was in my teeth and he said "let me see" and leaned forward and kissed me - and God I loved it! I wasn't expecting it and it was so hot and I felt it into the pit of my stomach and he was such a good kisser and his lips and tongue were so soft and hard, and I remember one of his hands on my face or neck and being so strong. I'm a little murky on the exact way that it all progressed because it was just so hot, but I know he told me at one time to tell him if it was going too fast or making me uncomfortable and I said no because everything was just perfect. I felt so safe with him and felt so good about everything - it was so exciting and at the same time so comfortable and natural. We moved around a little while kissing so we were laying down more with him on top of me, and he ran his hands over my still fully-clothed body and it felt so good and I just strained for more.
He asked if I wanted to go to the bedroom and I said yes and we walked while still kissing to the bedroom where he took off my shirt and I took off his. He pushed me lightly down on the bed and scooted me up, and we kissed more and we rolled so I was on top of him and he took my bra off and I loved the feel of his hands and mouth on my breasts, and I loved the feeling of straddling him because my whole being was so drawn to everything about him. He rolled me on my back and took off my jeans and I tried to get his off, and after he stood to take his pants off he came back and ripped my thong off and holy shit how hot is that!
I can't even describe every little thing but I'll say that he is very very good with his tongue and usually I don't feel much from oral sex but with him I felt a lot, and he's very very good with his fingers which I just loved! And now this is a lot of detail but I can't stop thinking about just how perfectly-sized his cock is - it's long and it's thick and from the second I held it in my hand I actually thought how perfect it was - and it was the most beautiful cock I've ever seen in life or porn or pictures, yes really! And while long and thick, it's not too thick so that it's uncomfortable to suck on and in fact I could suck it for a very long time and over and over - it fills my whole mouth perfectly but without causing me to have to uncomfortably stretch. I would very happily blow him every day! And while it's long, when I was straddling him and leaned back so he was all the way inside me, I could feel him up against my cervix but it was just wonderful pressure and stopped just short of being painful, but even a couple millimeters longer and it would have hurt. So seriously, he is THE PERFECT size for me! And GOD did he feel SO SO SO good inside of me!!! I can't stop thinking about it all and wanting so much more!
We fucked a total of four times that night and once the next morning, and between times we laid naked in bed and talked and cuddled and he showed me things on his computer and he took some naked pictures of me, and we also got up during that time and he made a fabulously tasty pasta dinner with ground chicken, garlic, onion, tomatoes, basil, and I forget now the kind of noodles - it was all so so so good and I got to eat the leftovers over the next two days!
I loved that he was so affectionate, too! When we laid in bed and I had my hand on his chest, he would put his hand on mine - and it made me feel so so good. I love and need both giving and receiving affection, and a lot of it, so I just loved being able to touch him and hold him and have him do the same to me. When we were about to fall asleep we spooned and he held my hands and I don't think there's any better way to be before falling asleep!
The whole night was just absolutely perfect and so wonderful, and we even talked about how it was almost dream-like. It was amazing for so many reasons. He's so cool and unique and interesting and smart and caring, and I could go on and on and on.
And the next morning I loved waking up next to him. I slept like a rock, which is completely normal for me usually. But at the same time, in the past when someone new has slept in my bed (and it's been quite awhile since that's happened) I've had a very fitful sleep and woken up many times. Anyway though, I just loved waking up and having him there. I loved kissing him in the morning. I loved cuddling and trying to wake up.
And eventually when I was able to finally get up to feed the babies and make coffee, V took a shower and I took pictures of him shaving in the shower. I like looking at them! :) And when he finished showering, we started kissing and then made our way back to the bedroom for wonderful morning sex. Just thinking about it makes me start throbbing a bit down below. And I was a little swollen from all the sex the night before so when he slid in me it felt so amazing! I want him again so badly - both sexually and just him.
Then afterward we drank coffee and sat next to each other on the couch and he showed me pictures on his computer while I put on my makeup. Oh and by the way, I've been interested in getting a Mac for my next computer for the past two or three months and have looked into it and read up on some of the cool features that Apple computers have. But now I want one more than ever because V has a Mac and showed me so many of the wonderful features! I'm going to start hinting more than ever to my mom!!! :)
Before we left, I took some pictures of V and I together, and some of him by himself, and many of his hands! I LOVE his hands, have I mentioned that?! And we talked a little about how short this visit had been but that neither of us had expected it to be like this and for there to be such an attraction. I had him drive through the city when he was taking me work - both so he could see some cool areas and because I knew it would take longer than if we took Lake Shore Drive. When we got to my work he pulled the car over to the side of the street and we kissed and hugged and kissed. I didn't want want him to have to leave so soon and I didn't want to stop touching him and kissing him. But I was also so excited that I'd found him, and so happy about our time together.
And since that time, I can't stop thinking about him! Not that I want to stop of course! We've emailed and talked on the phone, and just today we talked about where we could meet, hopefully soon. It does get a little complicated because we live so far from each other. But right now I'm not thinking so much about that because I just want to see what happens and keep getting to know him. And we both know much more about each other than normal people who have just met, and I think that will help me with being more open and able to talk about everything - because of course usually I'm bad about really talking about things like feelings or where something is going, because I'm afraid of hearing something I won't like. But here we have to be open and talk about how we feel, and I like that. So anyway, this is all a very new experience for me - from liking someone who lives so far away to feeling such a strong attraction and connection to someone so quickly - but I'm so excited by it and so full of joy and I feel so alive! And I have no idea what the future will bring - either tomorrow or next week or anytime - but even if the carpet was pulled out from under me tomorrow I would still be so happy this has happened and that I met him because I love this feeling of excitement and being alive, and I love that I've experienced such a wonderful attraction and connection!
There's so much more I could have written about our time, and I could have gone into so much more detail! But then this would have been soooooooooooooooooo long and it's so long already I think! I'm just so excited by this all!
And that's all for now. I'm being very lazy today but very happily lazy! Yes, very very very very very happy right now!!!!!
Yes, it's a guy, a man who's wonderful in so many ways and I'm just really discovering how many ways. And for some reason, despite all the feelings inside me and the thoughts in my head and the fact that for the past few days he's been a constant on my mind, I'm having trouble putting it all into words, getting all the things in my head organized enough to write about. Instead I feel that I'll be writing so disjointedly and not at all adequately expressing what I'm thinking and feeling.
[I've had this post ready to go for a couple hours now and have been just stuck on one thing: what to call this wonderful man. He has all these different facets to him and I don't want focus on just one and I'm just stuck! So for now I'm going to call him V because nothing else that I try to come up with satisfies me, and even calling him V doesn't satisfy me but if I don't use that, I'll sit here for the next five hours trying to think of something.]
So anyway, V is the guy who I was with from 4 p.m. on Tuesday until 10:30 a.m. on Wednesday. He doesn't live here and we live probably four hours apart by airplane. But in that short time, and actually within a couple seconds of meeting him, I felt things that I haven't felt in a very long time. It was amazing how drawn to him I was within seconds and it only grew, and usually it takes me awhile to like and or be attracted to someone and I also usually first see only the bad things about someone, probably on purpose. But with V, I got in the car and I was about instantly incredibly attracted to him, and as we talked I just liked him more and more - but it wasn't just a sexual thing, it was something more that I don't know exactly how to describe. I wanted to touch him, for him to touch me - even if was just our hands or a little touch on the leg. I wanted to be near him, I wanted to hold him and for him to hold me. This was all while still in the car and within minutes of our first meeting each other! I told him later that he was like a magnet because I felt pulled toward him instantaneously!
Before meeting, we had mostly just read each others' words, occasionally emailed, instant messaged recently, and we'd talked once on the phone for a long time and once the night before he came to Chicago. I wasn't at all expecting this, any of this. But it's so wonderful and amazing, and our 18 1/2 hours together were so incredible, and I feel so happy and excited from it all! I can understand now when people talk about there being an instant chemistry between two people, an instant magnetism.
I'll talk about our time together now! After he picked me up from work we drove up to my apartment - he was going to sleep on my couch and he'd bought groceries at Whole Foods because he was going to cook for me - yummy!!! In the car as I was feeling all these things I was trying to tell myself to slow down but even then my feelings were also saying in response to my logic, "I don't care, I want him to kiss me, I want his hands on me, I want him to fuck me" - yes, it was a little inner debate and my logic was not winning.
Okay so back to the story! We came inside and he took out a bag and he'd brought me presents!!! How sweet is that! He bought me his favorite kind and scent of candle - a Pacifica candle in Tunisian Jasmine scent - and for the rest of the night it followed us whereever we went and I've been burning it since he left, too, because the scent reminds me of him and our time together, and also cause it just smells so sweet and sensual and wonderful! Oh I love this: I just grabbed the little candle box and I have to write some of the things written on the box. First, just in regard to scent: "Natural and essential oils are carefully combined to celebrate fragrant beauty and its power to evoke a mood, a memory or a moment for one's soul." That's so beautiful and so true. And reminds me that I've tabbed some of the little things in a book I'm reading now regarding the power of our sense of smell - I'll write more on that soon. Okay, then on the back of the box it talks about Jasmine: "Jasmine, symbolizing grace, hope, love and happiness, has an incomparable fragrance and is one of the most valued materials in perfumery. Its oil is used as an aphrodisiac, to support pregnancy and facilitate in birth. In India, Jasmine is commonly called the "moonlight of the grove" since its white blooms release their heady fragrance only at night. This dreamy blend has the musky tea-like notes of a pure absolute." I love how that sounds!
Back to the story again! He also made me two CDs! It made me so happy that he'd thought of me and done something so sweet even before meeting me! I gave him a big hug and it felt so good and so right and we fit together so well! Oh yes, I haven't described him at all. Well first of all, one of my most important things is height and I'd never asked him how tall he was so I didn't know what to expect but as soon as I got in the car I could tell he was tall and I love that! And he has the perfect kind of body that I find the most attractive - tall and slender but not at all skinny, and with natural muscles, so he looks fabulous both in clothes and out of them! And even his outfit that he was wearing was my favorite kind on a guy - very cool jeans, black t-shirt, and such a cool-looking jacket that I don't know how to describe because I don't know the right words for fashion stuff. And he had a chain hanging from the side of his jeans to his wallet in his back pocket - I like what I view as little badass things like that!! :) And his face is so good looking - once again, I'm never good with describing faces but it's this perfect combo of cute and hot - and when he smiles he has a little dimple! And I also found that his lips are so soft and his bottom lip is full and I love feeling it on my lips and I just want to draw it in and suck on it all the time! Oh and okay, now I come to one of my favorite things - his hands!!! He has the most amazingly sexy hands ever!!! And also forearms, and I just LOVE hands and forearms! I took so many pictures of his hands because just seeing them is such an instant turn-on for me! He has three tattoos and I especially like the one on the top of one his forearms, it's beautifully done, looks so cool, and has meaning behind it - all of which makes it very cool. I think he may be a little embarrassed when he finds out how much I just went on and on and on about all this! But I can't help it, and this is my little diary so I get to talk about how sexy he is all I want! :)
Okay well he took a quick shower and I started playing the CDs he made for me, and we sat on the couch for just a little while and then we went to the kitchen and I finished cleaning the dishes that I hadn't been able to finish while he cooked up some very yummy appetizers for us - he made it look so easy and it was so good! He toasted little slices of bread and on half of them he put pieces of a red pepper that he roasted on the stove and then cooked in the oven, and on that he put goat cheese and then a little slice of lettuce - so pretty! And on the other half of the toasted bread he put a slice of tomato and a slice of good parmesean cheese and then a leaf of basil! Seriously, they looked so beautiful and both kinds tasted so wonderful and complex! Oh - and after he'd toasted the bread I turned around from the sink one of many times and he was drizzling olive oil on the bread, and I know this sounds so silly but he knows what he's doing and competence turns me on, and seeing him drizzle the olive oil in such a cool way with his finger over the top of it - well yes it turned me on even more!
So anyway, the whole time I was cleaning and he was cooking we were also talking and it was so nice and also felt so intimate with us both being in the kitchen and so close. I love cooking with someone! And then we took our candle and our plate of food to the living room and sat right next to each other on the couch, very cozy and I was very very cognizant of our legs touching and our every now and then other little touches. The sexual tension was amazing, at least for me! I couldn't be completely certain that he was into me, but I was incredibly and so so so strongly drawn to him (and it was the same exact way for him as I found out later). We took some pictures of the appetizers and he showed me how he takes very cool pictures where at the end of the exposure he moves the candle around. And he brought Pelligrino to drink and cut limes for us to put in it so even the drink seemed exotic and special - and I liked that a lot, having something cool to drink cause I sometimes miss that since I stopped drinking alcohol.
I'm getting so excited just writing this! When we started eating the appetizers I warned him that I'm a freak about my teeth and anything being stuck in them so told him I'd be asking him all the time to check my teeth for me. And then one of those times, after I'd finished my piece of toast, I asked him if anything was in my teeth and he said "let me see" and leaned forward and kissed me - and God I loved it! I wasn't expecting it and it was so hot and I felt it into the pit of my stomach and he was such a good kisser and his lips and tongue were so soft and hard, and I remember one of his hands on my face or neck and being so strong. I'm a little murky on the exact way that it all progressed because it was just so hot, but I know he told me at one time to tell him if it was going too fast or making me uncomfortable and I said no because everything was just perfect. I felt so safe with him and felt so good about everything - it was so exciting and at the same time so comfortable and natural. We moved around a little while kissing so we were laying down more with him on top of me, and he ran his hands over my still fully-clothed body and it felt so good and I just strained for more.
He asked if I wanted to go to the bedroom and I said yes and we walked while still kissing to the bedroom where he took off my shirt and I took off his. He pushed me lightly down on the bed and scooted me up, and we kissed more and we rolled so I was on top of him and he took my bra off and I loved the feel of his hands and mouth on my breasts, and I loved the feeling of straddling him because my whole being was so drawn to everything about him. He rolled me on my back and took off my jeans and I tried to get his off, and after he stood to take his pants off he came back and ripped my thong off and holy shit how hot is that!
I can't even describe every little thing but I'll say that he is very very good with his tongue and usually I don't feel much from oral sex but with him I felt a lot, and he's very very good with his fingers which I just loved! And now this is a lot of detail but I can't stop thinking about just how perfectly-sized his cock is - it's long and it's thick and from the second I held it in my hand I actually thought how perfect it was - and it was the most beautiful cock I've ever seen in life or porn or pictures, yes really! And while long and thick, it's not too thick so that it's uncomfortable to suck on and in fact I could suck it for a very long time and over and over - it fills my whole mouth perfectly but without causing me to have to uncomfortably stretch. I would very happily blow him every day! And while it's long, when I was straddling him and leaned back so he was all the way inside me, I could feel him up against my cervix but it was just wonderful pressure and stopped just short of being painful, but even a couple millimeters longer and it would have hurt. So seriously, he is THE PERFECT size for me! And GOD did he feel SO SO SO good inside of me!!! I can't stop thinking about it all and wanting so much more!
We fucked a total of four times that night and once the next morning, and between times we laid naked in bed and talked and cuddled and he showed me things on his computer and he took some naked pictures of me, and we also got up during that time and he made a fabulously tasty pasta dinner with ground chicken, garlic, onion, tomatoes, basil, and I forget now the kind of noodles - it was all so so so good and I got to eat the leftovers over the next two days!
I loved that he was so affectionate, too! When we laid in bed and I had my hand on his chest, he would put his hand on mine - and it made me feel so so good. I love and need both giving and receiving affection, and a lot of it, so I just loved being able to touch him and hold him and have him do the same to me. When we were about to fall asleep we spooned and he held my hands and I don't think there's any better way to be before falling asleep!
The whole night was just absolutely perfect and so wonderful, and we even talked about how it was almost dream-like. It was amazing for so many reasons. He's so cool and unique and interesting and smart and caring, and I could go on and on and on.
And the next morning I loved waking up next to him. I slept like a rock, which is completely normal for me usually. But at the same time, in the past when someone new has slept in my bed (and it's been quite awhile since that's happened) I've had a very fitful sleep and woken up many times. Anyway though, I just loved waking up and having him there. I loved kissing him in the morning. I loved cuddling and trying to wake up.
And eventually when I was able to finally get up to feed the babies and make coffee, V took a shower and I took pictures of him shaving in the shower. I like looking at them! :) And when he finished showering, we started kissing and then made our way back to the bedroom for wonderful morning sex. Just thinking about it makes me start throbbing a bit down below. And I was a little swollen from all the sex the night before so when he slid in me it felt so amazing! I want him again so badly - both sexually and just him.
Then afterward we drank coffee and sat next to each other on the couch and he showed me pictures on his computer while I put on my makeup. Oh and by the way, I've been interested in getting a Mac for my next computer for the past two or three months and have looked into it and read up on some of the cool features that Apple computers have. But now I want one more than ever because V has a Mac and showed me so many of the wonderful features! I'm going to start hinting more than ever to my mom!!! :)
Before we left, I took some pictures of V and I together, and some of him by himself, and many of his hands! I LOVE his hands, have I mentioned that?! And we talked a little about how short this visit had been but that neither of us had expected it to be like this and for there to be such an attraction. I had him drive through the city when he was taking me work - both so he could see some cool areas and because I knew it would take longer than if we took Lake Shore Drive. When we got to my work he pulled the car over to the side of the street and we kissed and hugged and kissed. I didn't want want him to have to leave so soon and I didn't want to stop touching him and kissing him. But I was also so excited that I'd found him, and so happy about our time together.
And since that time, I can't stop thinking about him! Not that I want to stop of course! We've emailed and talked on the phone, and just today we talked about where we could meet, hopefully soon. It does get a little complicated because we live so far from each other. But right now I'm not thinking so much about that because I just want to see what happens and keep getting to know him. And we both know much more about each other than normal people who have just met, and I think that will help me with being more open and able to talk about everything - because of course usually I'm bad about really talking about things like feelings or where something is going, because I'm afraid of hearing something I won't like. But here we have to be open and talk about how we feel, and I like that. So anyway, this is all a very new experience for me - from liking someone who lives so far away to feeling such a strong attraction and connection to someone so quickly - but I'm so excited by it and so full of joy and I feel so alive! And I have no idea what the future will bring - either tomorrow or next week or anytime - but even if the carpet was pulled out from under me tomorrow I would still be so happy this has happened and that I met him because I love this feeling of excitement and being alive, and I love that I've experienced such a wonderful attraction and connection!
There's so much more I could have written about our time, and I could have gone into so much more detail! But then this would have been soooooooooooooooooo long and it's so long already I think! I'm just so excited by this all!
And that's all for now. I'm being very lazy today but very happily lazy! Yes, very very very very very happy right now!!!!!
