Thursday, June 29, 2006

Staying up late and hopefully my first bit of music on here!!

Okay, I'm not going to write too much in case this doesn't work, but I've wanted to be able to post music on here for awhile, and also to be able to join in for WDKY's fabulous Musical Mondays, so I hope this works! And I think I might sometimes be adding music on days besides Mondays, at least at first - because there are so many songs I love!!!

Anyway, this first test song is Windfall by Son Volt, and it's such a pretty and cool song and I listen to it over and over again whenever I play it, and it's also good because it makes me think of Florida and Asparagus as I first heard the song a few months ago when I went to a Son Volt concert with them. So I love the song, I love Florida and Asparagus, and even though there are about 1,000 songs I thought about doing first, this is the one that won out today!



It's 2:32 a.m. on Friday morning right now, but I'm still going to date this from last night because that's just what I do. I stayed up late so I could actually get things done, and the middle of the night is when I'm able to focus. After work I went to a grocery store - a wonderful little store about eight to ten blocks down the street from me (I took the bus back to my place cause I would have died trying to carry the stuff all the way back in my heels). I love this store because it's so ethnic and has a huge amount of counter/refrigerator things where guys get the stuff for you (can you tell I'm not an expert grocery shopper?!), and I even waited and got some feta from the guy (there were five or six kinds of feta to choose from) and waiting and all that is a little out of my comfort zone so I was proud of my little extra effort there.

Well so anyway, I got some good food and some healthy stuff and some fruit and what not. And when I got home I tore up some of the fresh spinach and cut up some of the feta and put some walnut pieces in and had myself a salad. It was pretty good, so maybe I'll be able to make that sometimes. I didn't eat anything else but I had a huge lunch - there was a little retirement party at a restaurant in Greektown so The Meat, The Queen, Florida, Freckles, The Italian Chef and I all went. Tomorrow morning I could have yogurt, or an orange, or an English muffin. I think maybe I'll have the English muffin and bring a yogurt and an orange with me for lunch - it's a plan now!

Okay so anyway, after I got home from the grocery store it was almost 8 p.m. and I really wanted to be so productive and do all my dishes and vacuum, and also it's TIC's birthday on Saturday so I bought brownie mix to make brownies for her for tomorrow - and I'll be writing on it with frosting and putting some candles in there for her to blow out tomorrow afternoon! Well anyway, after I was good and made my salad and ate it on the couch, my butt didn't move back off the couch and suddenly it was almost midnight and I was getting so tired but I hadn't made the brownies yet, so I decided to just be productive. I made coffee and I spent an hour doing all the dishes and cleaning the kitchen, and then I made the brownies and while they were cooking I started putting blue tape around my dining room because I'm definitely going to paint that this weekend.

Now the brownies are all out and cooling so I can put the top on it and I'm going to go to bed very soon but first I need to exfoliate my face cause my skin is just rough in a couple places so that needs to be fixed!

Tomorrow after work I'm supposed to meet the guy whose son's pictures I took last night at the guy's boat downtown. It's kind of a weird situation because I don't understand it and I don't know yet what this guy is after or not after. But I sort of told him I'd go hang out for a bit and I feel like I'm being pursued by him in a way and that's making me a bit uncomfortable, but then again he could just be the friendly guy that he's holding himself out to be. Because after all, he did introduce me to his wife last night and we talked for awhile, and I chatted more with his 22-year-old daughter who I initially met on his boat. But I don't understand him hanging out with young girls and what's going on there. It's very odd. But because the boat is very close to my work I'll go for a little while right after work but then I'm leaving so I can get stuff done tomorrow night, and also I desperately need a mystic tan because I think it's suppose to be hot this weekend so I can't cover my white skin up with long sleeves.

Hmmm, there was something else that I wanted to talk about but now I can't think what it is. Oh well. This morning when I was walking to the train I passed a little house on a corner and the guy was mowing his little square of lawn, and the smell of the freshly cut grass was so absolutely amazing and made me so happy as I breathed in the scent over and over - I love little things like that! Oh and I accomplished one of the things I had to get done today - to call my student loan place and get a lower monthly payment and change my address and also apply to consolidate the two loans to lock in the rate before the rates go up on Saturday. I have a pretty small loan and I feel so so so good just to get this taken care of - it's the assignment my mom gave me for the week and she's been following up nicely every day and she even broke down the parts of the task for me - all because of this personality test and how she sees what I need now!

Okay, time for me to go to bed. I think it will be extra hard for me to get up in the morning, and that's saying a lot. Tomorrow night I really need to try to do at least a couple loads of laundry because it's getting desperate around here. And I'll also sweep and vacuum my place. And finish taping the dining room for painting. And then sleep in a little on Saturday morning!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Written by Caterpillar :: 6/29/2006 11:59:00 PM :: ::


About Me

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly :: Anonymous

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly :: Buckminster Fuller



Name::Caterpillar
From::Chicago, United States

I'm a 30-year-old sometimes girl and sometimes woman living in Chicago. Over the past year I have faced my biggest demon and won, and as a result I have hope again for wonderful and fabulous things to happen! I'm still learning, growing and always trying to improve myself, but I absolutely love life and think I'm very close to becoming a real butterfly!!!
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How I Feel

"I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved."

"Desire is an entirely free sensation, loose in the air, vibrating, filling life with the will to have something..."

- Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

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Quotes That Touch and Inspire Me

♥ I think that the most beautiful women I've ever met are the ones that know who they are, have stories to tell, ideas to share, wisdom to impart and love the skin they're in. No one can love us as we love ourselves. No one can take away our beauty and our dignity when we own those things. To me confident=beautiful. :: CeeCi

♥ I'd been feeling a little blue (for no particular reason) when I began thinking about things like attention, age and body image. Suddenly, it washed over me. I see people looking at me and I see them reacting. I began thinking about the times I notice the attention and realized its the days I'm strutting, the days I'm open and holding my head up. This got me to thinking further. How I perceive myself is what I show to others...People don't realize it, but they show the world everything about themselves in the way they move and act, in the words they say and the way they say them. A little confidence can lead to a lot of confidence. :: CeeCi

♥ When we believe in ourselves the world is an entirely different place and our place in it feels right and happy and healthy. :: CeeCi

♥ Remember that something incredibly wonderful is always possible!

♥ There are moments that are wonderful, if you let them be.

♥ Being distrustful put me in a very lonely place, a place filled with doubt and hypervigilance. I'm grateful I've learned to trust again, because in learning to do it, I learned to trust myself. :: CeeCi

♥ We're all a work in progress. I believe we will be until the day our lives end. Why fight it? I love the changes I experience. Some are certainly easier and more enjoyable than others, yet I wouldn't stop the process for any thing in the world. :: CeeCi

♥ We may run, walk, stumble, drive, or fly, but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey, or miss the chance to see a rainbow on the way :: Gloria Gaither

♥ Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed :: Storm Jameson

♥ Love is everything. It is the reason we are here, and the wonder we take with us wherever we go.

♥ Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow :: Mary Anne Radmacher

♥ Just live in the moment, the moment you're in. Don't live two days from now. Don't live two hours in advance. Live now. And appreciate what you have now. Don't go any further. You have this moment. This second. Breathe it. Enjoy it. Live in it. :: Open Eyes

♥ Leap, and the net will appear.

♥ I've learnt that when we express our deepest feelings, even though we may stammer or be unable to find the right words, it always pays. It pays to be authentic.

♥ There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness :: Carl Jung

♥ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death :: Robert Fulghum

♥ You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. :: Ethel Barrymore

♥ Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. :: Carl Jung

♥ I will try to be as honest as I can with myself. That is all that is required of me. I'll keep admitting and opening my hidden box of fears, hurts and insecurities, again and again, until I know each one of them by their first name. :: Anu

♥ It struck me that there is amazing beauty everywhere. Does it matter where you are or who we're encountering? There is magic all around us. The fact that we're alive, the fact that we're living in this place and time. The fact that we've met the people we've met, all of it, every bit of it, only contributes to the wonder that is life. :: CeeCi

♥ No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the starts, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. :: Helen Keller

♥ Half of doing anything is believing that you can.

♥ Often God has to shut a door in our face, so that he can subsequently open the door through which he wants us to go. :: Catherine Marshall

♥ Even if it burns a little low at times, the secret of life is to always keep the flame of hope alive.

♥ The three grand essentials of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for.

♥ Some people will say that you are going the wrong way, when it is simply a way of your own.

♥ Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion. :: Martha Graham

♥ Life is a series of new beginnings, and in every ordinary moment there are a thousand miracles to behold.

♥ Don't let the approval of others determine your belief in yourself.

♥ When it's all said and done, when all the opinions have been uttered, preached, shouted, and shared, there is only one thing we can do: From this moment on...love.

♥ When you're stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin you need only to change one thing. :: Christina Baldwin

♥ You have to look for the joy. Look for the light of God that is hitting your life, and you will find sparkles you didn't know were there.

♥ Be the change you wish to see in the world... :: Gandhi

♥ Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

♥ We each have only a limited amount of time here. We have to do more with it - pay attention, explore, be open to all of life. Because we have only one chance, we have to make life seem longer than it really is. :: Viggo Mortensen

♥ Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. :: Cadet Maxim

♥ Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!

♥ What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? :: Unknown

♥ To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. :: David Viscott, M.D

♥ Right now it feels like:...no dream will ever remain unfulfilled...no desire will ever remain unanswered...no tear goes unnoticed and no effort wasted...the hills are alive and so are we...each moment is fresh and waiting to happen...and there will be garbage like situations all around...but it is upto us to light mud lamps in it...and glow in our own acceptance and appreciations... :: Anu

♥ I struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough at times. Usually, its because I'm pushing it too hard and have depleted my reserve. Yet, I know without a shadow of a doubt that no matter how heavy or thin, how young or old I appear to others it's what I feel on the inside that glows through. If I could give every person on this planet just one gift it would be the unwavering knowledge that they are beautiful and worthy of every good thing the universe holds. :: CeeCi

♥ It's easier to buy into the negative things we conjure about ourselves than the positive things. Knowing that is the first step towards changing the thoughts that keep us unhappy. With time moving forward, why stay trapped in the past? All we have is right here and right now, I intend to make the most of it! :: CeeCi