Thursday, June 22, 2006

Nasty pictures!

The German just left about ten minutes ago. We had a sweet time and then a bit of a wild time, both of which were fun. When he got here we kissed in our normal greeting and hugged, but his hug was extra - he hugged me very close and very tightly. And he kissed and hugged me again not even a minute later. That made me happy!

He had told me that he was stopping at a grocery store on his way over to my place and had asked whether I wanted anything - I didn't because I'm leaving on the train tomorrow after work to go visit my parents in Michigan - and The German is taking care of my babies for me. Anyway though, he walked in with all his bags and after our hugs and kisses he began unpacking so he could put a few things in the frige, and I found out that over half of his purchases were for us to cook dinner tonight! I love that! He did most of the prep work as I'm just so not a natural in the kitchen and he has been as long as I've known him. Anyway though, we had a romaine salad with balsamic vinegarette, a few slices of very thinly sliced steak, some chips and hummus, and for dessert he cut up strawberries and mixed in honey, vanilla and yogurt and it was the most amazing dessert ever! :)

After eating all that stuff I was stuffed and The German said we could lie down and rest. He stripped to his boxers and I took off my work pants and we cuddled on the bed, and I honestly just wanted to go to sleep. Even when, after awhile of resting, I could tell he was horny, I wanted none of it and just wanted to lay there with him tickling my back while I went to sleep. He got up to take a cold shower cause it was a little hot in my room, and when he came back in I didn't even open my eyes I don't think but just rolled over and into him and his chest pillow! He put up with that for a few minutes until he made a sudden move and I was on my back and he was at my side and leaning over me, and I could feel a certain excitement pressed into my leg.

Anyway, I made him get me excited and encouraged him when he lightly ran his hands all over me again and again. It was so erotic, and I told him so. And it was also a wonderful tease as he would run his fingers as lightly and quickly over a certain place as he did to the rest of me. It was so good! And the whole time he was kissing my neck, how did I forget to write that first!? Yes, he started the whole thing out by kissing my neck and earlobes, and between that and the body tickle I was pretty much putty in his hands.

I'm going to speed over a lot of the fun action there to get to our bit of nastiness! :) We had been every once in awhile talking about some pictures that we'd like to take, so in the middle of him fingering me he left to get my camera. And then we resumed where he had left off but took various pictures of it this time! And after some pictures and some more play after that, he also took a few pictures of me blowing him. I've never had pictures like these of myself, so it's pretty hot for me to look at them! And we looked at them together before he left to go home.

Now a couple little things. First, at dinner I found myself feeling pressure to be fun and entertaining instead of just being me. I don't like that at all! Second, while we were cleaning up the dishes he started talking about a friend of his in Germany who is going with his wife and little girl on a six day sailing trip - the owners of the boat are a husband and wife and they'll be on the boat and taking care of anything. But back to my point - The German then started saying that he'll probably do that - take on passengers every now and then for a little money and a little company. So he still plans on eventually getting a bigger boat and sailing it all around the world all by himself.

Okay, I keep falling asleep while writing this and when I just tried to read it over to see if I made sense and had any spelling or grammar errors I kept falling asleep again. So I'm going to bed. Tomorrow night I'll be on the train to see my parents! And I always still type when I'm at the parents' place, so I'll be writing more there probably tomorrow night. Holy fuck am I so tired, so I'm off to bed.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Written by Caterpillar :: 6/22/2006 11:42:00 PM :: ::


About Me

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly :: Anonymous

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly :: Buckminster Fuller



Name::Caterpillar
From::Chicago, United States

I'm a 30-year-old sometimes girl and sometimes woman living in Chicago. Over the past year I have faced my biggest demon and won, and as a result I have hope again for wonderful and fabulous things to happen! I'm still learning, growing and always trying to improve myself, but I absolutely love life and think I'm very close to becoming a real butterfly!!!
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How I Feel

"I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved."

"Desire is an entirely free sensation, loose in the air, vibrating, filling life with the will to have something..."

- Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

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Quotes That Touch and Inspire Me

♥ I think that the most beautiful women I've ever met are the ones that know who they are, have stories to tell, ideas to share, wisdom to impart and love the skin they're in. No one can love us as we love ourselves. No one can take away our beauty and our dignity when we own those things. To me confident=beautiful. :: CeeCi

♥ I'd been feeling a little blue (for no particular reason) when I began thinking about things like attention, age and body image. Suddenly, it washed over me. I see people looking at me and I see them reacting. I began thinking about the times I notice the attention and realized its the days I'm strutting, the days I'm open and holding my head up. This got me to thinking further. How I perceive myself is what I show to others...People don't realize it, but they show the world everything about themselves in the way they move and act, in the words they say and the way they say them. A little confidence can lead to a lot of confidence. :: CeeCi

♥ When we believe in ourselves the world is an entirely different place and our place in it feels right and happy and healthy. :: CeeCi

♥ Remember that something incredibly wonderful is always possible!

♥ There are moments that are wonderful, if you let them be.

♥ Being distrustful put me in a very lonely place, a place filled with doubt and hypervigilance. I'm grateful I've learned to trust again, because in learning to do it, I learned to trust myself. :: CeeCi

♥ We're all a work in progress. I believe we will be until the day our lives end. Why fight it? I love the changes I experience. Some are certainly easier and more enjoyable than others, yet I wouldn't stop the process for any thing in the world. :: CeeCi

♥ We may run, walk, stumble, drive, or fly, but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey, or miss the chance to see a rainbow on the way :: Gloria Gaither

♥ Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed :: Storm Jameson

♥ Love is everything. It is the reason we are here, and the wonder we take with us wherever we go.

♥ Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow :: Mary Anne Radmacher

♥ Just live in the moment, the moment you're in. Don't live two days from now. Don't live two hours in advance. Live now. And appreciate what you have now. Don't go any further. You have this moment. This second. Breathe it. Enjoy it. Live in it. :: Open Eyes

♥ Leap, and the net will appear.

♥ I've learnt that when we express our deepest feelings, even though we may stammer or be unable to find the right words, it always pays. It pays to be authentic.

♥ There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness :: Carl Jung

♥ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death :: Robert Fulghum

♥ You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. :: Ethel Barrymore

♥ Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. :: Carl Jung

♥ I will try to be as honest as I can with myself. That is all that is required of me. I'll keep admitting and opening my hidden box of fears, hurts and insecurities, again and again, until I know each one of them by their first name. :: Anu

♥ It struck me that there is amazing beauty everywhere. Does it matter where you are or who we're encountering? There is magic all around us. The fact that we're alive, the fact that we're living in this place and time. The fact that we've met the people we've met, all of it, every bit of it, only contributes to the wonder that is life. :: CeeCi

♥ No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the starts, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. :: Helen Keller

♥ Half of doing anything is believing that you can.

♥ Often God has to shut a door in our face, so that he can subsequently open the door through which he wants us to go. :: Catherine Marshall

♥ Even if it burns a little low at times, the secret of life is to always keep the flame of hope alive.

♥ The three grand essentials of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for.

♥ Some people will say that you are going the wrong way, when it is simply a way of your own.

♥ Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion. :: Martha Graham

♥ Life is a series of new beginnings, and in every ordinary moment there are a thousand miracles to behold.

♥ Don't let the approval of others determine your belief in yourself.

♥ When it's all said and done, when all the opinions have been uttered, preached, shouted, and shared, there is only one thing we can do: From this moment on...love.

♥ When you're stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin you need only to change one thing. :: Christina Baldwin

♥ You have to look for the joy. Look for the light of God that is hitting your life, and you will find sparkles you didn't know were there.

♥ Be the change you wish to see in the world... :: Gandhi

♥ Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

♥ We each have only a limited amount of time here. We have to do more with it - pay attention, explore, be open to all of life. Because we have only one chance, we have to make life seem longer than it really is. :: Viggo Mortensen

♥ Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. :: Cadet Maxim

♥ Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!

♥ What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? :: Unknown

♥ To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. :: David Viscott, M.D

♥ Right now it feels like:...no dream will ever remain unfulfilled...no desire will ever remain unanswered...no tear goes unnoticed and no effort wasted...the hills are alive and so are we...each moment is fresh and waiting to happen...and there will be garbage like situations all around...but it is upto us to light mud lamps in it...and glow in our own acceptance and appreciations... :: Anu

♥ I struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough at times. Usually, its because I'm pushing it too hard and have depleted my reserve. Yet, I know without a shadow of a doubt that no matter how heavy or thin, how young or old I appear to others it's what I feel on the inside that glows through. If I could give every person on this planet just one gift it would be the unwavering knowledge that they are beautiful and worthy of every good thing the universe holds. :: CeeCi

♥ It's easier to buy into the negative things we conjure about ourselves than the positive things. Knowing that is the first step towards changing the thoughts that keep us unhappy. With time moving forward, why stay trapped in the past? All we have is right here and right now, I intend to make the most of it! :: CeeCi