Friday, September 23, 2005

My wonderful Friday night!! And a couple other drunken thoughts!

I had the best, best, best time tonight! Just a happy, fun, wonderful time! And it was The Italian Chef, Asparagus, Florida and I going to dinner! I just love hanging out with them and all of us being together - we have so many laughs and so many stories and so many things and more laughs and it's just wonderful!!! We went to a Mexican restaurant near where The Italian Chef (TIC) lives. And TIC, Florida and I shared two pitchers of margaritas, so we were quite happy by the end of the night! (And I am still a bit drunk!) And the food was all so wonderful! But the best of all was just being with them and having fun.

TIC and I left work at 4:00 so we could get to Northwestern Hospital for TIC's doctor appointment. When we were on the bus going there, TIC told me that, to keep the peace in her house, she had decided to let her husband have sex with her so he wouldn't be so ornery (sp?). It doesn't sound funny as I write it, but it's absolutely hilarious when she says these things, and talks about him and sex. He's 68, and she's always complaining about how a man of his age shouldn't want sex so much. She's very Italian and so she can get hot tempered, and I think he likes it! It's a kind of foreplay for him! And the way she puts it, how she will put up with having sex with him, is that she "can take two minutes to keep the peace..." And by two minutes - yes, that's all the time he takes. Every time. And what's funny is that she would be happy with even less, but after every single time, he gives a sigh/moan, and then an excuse as to why he came so fast. Every single time!!! And she wants to laugh and at the same time tell him that she'd be happy if he lasted one second. It's just so funny to hear these things! The stories about him just crack me up! Also, they just started sleeping in the same bed again now that they had their upstairs turned into rooms, and TIC told her husband that he couldn't come home tired and fall asleep in his clothes; instead, he had to change and wear pajamas. This is so cute: he got a pair of blue cotton pj's, with the shirt and pants, only they didn't fit him because he's so short and small. So, he actually took them to a tailor and got them altered!!! How funny is that! He had the pants shortened and the sleeves on the shirt shortened! It's so so so cute!!! Just to please TIC! And I get a smile on my face whenever I picture him coming out of a little tiny dressing area in his pj's and standing there to have them altered!!! It's hilarious!!! And in the cutest way!!!!

So anyway, after TIC's doctor appointment, we took the bus to her house and hung out for a couple hours until Florida and Asparagus got there. There was lots of Italian-style yelling at her house today! It's always fun and always amusing. And I also always love being there - because I just love the constant flow of people and drama! Florida and Asparagus got there at about 7:30, and soon after we left for the restaurant.

And it's one of those many nights with all of them where I won't remember specific details or exactly what we talked about, but I will always remember where we sat, what we ate, and how much fun we had during the whole night! And I'll remember how I told Asparagus about the trials involving steel companies, and how horny they get me - because the following words/phrases are used constantly: erection, erecting, members, and steel members. And I know there are two more terms, because I have kept a list at one point, but I can't remember the others right now! But it's fair to say that during those trials, at some points, I am not paying any attention to the actual testimony and am instead paying attention to the many fantasties and dreams and sexual situations floating through my head!!!

Back to tonight - I love these guys. I really do. And part of me feels and knows that I will be always be in contact with them and close to them, and part of me is scared because I know things change, and I know Florida and Asparagus are planning on having a baby and moving to the suburbs and it really scares me that I'll never see them then and will lose contact. And they're so fun and cool that I don't want that to happen. But I'm really bad about calling people, so I worry.

I had a sex dream about The Meat last night. It was a little disturbing, although hot. The dream was, as most dreams are, running all over the place. Mostly, it was a reception for my brother and TSIL, but before they were married, so that it was a full reception, but also then a bachelor/bachelorette party afterward. That part of the dream lasted for forever. And then, everyone was leaving, and I was planning on going up to my room. But then The Meat appeared and said, "we're going out somewhere, right?" And I said, "of course!" So we went with a bunch of guys from the party (no one I knew, just random faces in my dream) and we were all standing on some L train while it went, and no one was really talking. The Meat was standing behind me, and he would grab my waist or thigh every now and then. And then suddenly, he lifted the back of my skirt (yes, I was wearing a skirt in my dream, which is unlike me usually) and he slid his dick in me from behind. And it felt so good! But at the same time, I saw the guys around us looking at it and knew that it was completely obvious. So I pulled away and turned to him and told him he had to wait and pushed him back in his pants. Then we got of the L and somehow we then got back to my room. It wasn't my apartment but more just my bedroom, but just bigger and different. So we fell on the bed, and he said I was going to be happy this time (because apparently, there was another time when I had serviced him quite nicely). He had on just his pants and a t-shirt, and he took off the t-shirt. And we kissed. And then he was working on my pussy. And then somehow, dreamlike, we were on another bed and I got up to go there to him. I was wondering about a necklace he had around his neck. I had only glimsed it, but it was on a thin gold chain and looked almost like one of those Jewish stars, but at the same time I knew it wasn't that, which was why I wanted to get a new and good look at it. But I never did. I don't remember much after this, although I remember him entering me once from on top, and once from behind. But no other details. Like I said, disturbing, but also hot and arousing. But I don't want to be having dreams like this, because I like having a little crush from afar, but absolutely nothing further.

Speaking of hot and arousing, I have been and still am completely infactuated with Gael Garcia Bernal. The amazing actor in Y Tu Mama Tambien and Motorcycle Diaries, among others. He is first of all, outrageously hot. And he has the dark skin and dark hair that always attracts me, as well as an accent that attracts me and the fact that he grew up in a different country and culture. And also, he is smart and so so so talented, and chooses the most interesting and challenging roles. I just adore this man!

I want to get the DVD of Y Tu Mama Tambien. I love that movie. I saw it in the theater and left feeling that my eyes had been opened and my life changed in some way. The dialog is fabulous, the cinematography is fabulous, and the sexual energy is amazing. All three main actors are just perfect, and their journey and learning experience is amazing. And of course, Gael Garcia is just amazing, and perfect, and sexy as hell, and a dream fuck! Yummy, yummy, yummy!!!!

And I also want to get the DVD of Motorcycle Diaries, which is also a wonderful movie, and so interesting since it's based on the diary of Che Guevara. I bought the book of his diary translated into English soon after the movie came out, but it's still on my shelf here, waiting to be read. I just started a new book, so I think I'll put it as next on the list!

I'm going to fall asleep any time now - I'm both drunk and tired. Tonight was so wonderful and I love nights like this when I hang out with my friends and am just so so so happy!!!!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Written by Caterpillar :: 9/23/2005 11:58:00 PM :: ::


About Me

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly :: Anonymous

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly :: Buckminster Fuller



Name::Caterpillar
From::Chicago, United States

I'm a 30-year-old sometimes girl and sometimes woman living in Chicago. Over the past year I have faced my biggest demon and won, and as a result I have hope again for wonderful and fabulous things to happen! I'm still learning, growing and always trying to improve myself, but I absolutely love life and think I'm very close to becoming a real butterfly!!!
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How I Feel

"I am two women: one wants to have all the joy, passion and adventure that life can give me. The other wants to be a slave to routine, to family life, to the things that can be planned and achieved."

"Desire is an entirely free sensation, loose in the air, vibrating, filling life with the will to have something..."

- Eleven Minutes by Paulo Coelho

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Quotes That Touch and Inspire Me

♥ I think that the most beautiful women I've ever met are the ones that know who they are, have stories to tell, ideas to share, wisdom to impart and love the skin they're in. No one can love us as we love ourselves. No one can take away our beauty and our dignity when we own those things. To me confident=beautiful. :: CeeCi

♥ I'd been feeling a little blue (for no particular reason) when I began thinking about things like attention, age and body image. Suddenly, it washed over me. I see people looking at me and I see them reacting. I began thinking about the times I notice the attention and realized its the days I'm strutting, the days I'm open and holding my head up. This got me to thinking further. How I perceive myself is what I show to others...People don't realize it, but they show the world everything about themselves in the way they move and act, in the words they say and the way they say them. A little confidence can lead to a lot of confidence. :: CeeCi

♥ When we believe in ourselves the world is an entirely different place and our place in it feels right and happy and healthy. :: CeeCi

♥ Remember that something incredibly wonderful is always possible!

♥ There are moments that are wonderful, if you let them be.

♥ Being distrustful put me in a very lonely place, a place filled with doubt and hypervigilance. I'm grateful I've learned to trust again, because in learning to do it, I learned to trust myself. :: CeeCi

♥ We're all a work in progress. I believe we will be until the day our lives end. Why fight it? I love the changes I experience. Some are certainly easier and more enjoyable than others, yet I wouldn't stop the process for any thing in the world. :: CeeCi

♥ We may run, walk, stumble, drive, or fly, but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey, or miss the chance to see a rainbow on the way :: Gloria Gaither

♥ Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed :: Storm Jameson

♥ Love is everything. It is the reason we are here, and the wonder we take with us wherever we go.

♥ Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow :: Mary Anne Radmacher

♥ Just live in the moment, the moment you're in. Don't live two days from now. Don't live two hours in advance. Live now. And appreciate what you have now. Don't go any further. You have this moment. This second. Breathe it. Enjoy it. Live in it. :: Open Eyes

♥ Leap, and the net will appear.

♥ I've learnt that when we express our deepest feelings, even though we may stammer or be unable to find the right words, it always pays. It pays to be authentic.

♥ There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness :: Carl Jung

♥ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge, myth is more potent than history, dreams are more powerful than facts, hope always triumphs over experience, laughter is the cure for grief, love is stronger than death :: Robert Fulghum

♥ You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. :: Ethel Barrymore

♥ Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. :: Carl Jung

♥ I will try to be as honest as I can with myself. That is all that is required of me. I'll keep admitting and opening my hidden box of fears, hurts and insecurities, again and again, until I know each one of them by their first name. :: Anu

♥ It struck me that there is amazing beauty everywhere. Does it matter where you are or who we're encountering? There is magic all around us. The fact that we're alive, the fact that we're living in this place and time. The fact that we've met the people we've met, all of it, every bit of it, only contributes to the wonder that is life. :: CeeCi

♥ No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the starts, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. :: Helen Keller

♥ Half of doing anything is believing that you can.

♥ Often God has to shut a door in our face, so that he can subsequently open the door through which he wants us to go. :: Catherine Marshall

♥ Even if it burns a little low at times, the secret of life is to always keep the flame of hope alive.

♥ The three grand essentials of happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for.

♥ Some people will say that you are going the wrong way, when it is simply a way of your own.

♥ Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion. :: Martha Graham

♥ Life is a series of new beginnings, and in every ordinary moment there are a thousand miracles to behold.

♥ Don't let the approval of others determine your belief in yourself.

♥ When it's all said and done, when all the opinions have been uttered, preached, shouted, and shared, there is only one thing we can do: From this moment on...love.

♥ When you're stuck in a spiral, to change all aspects of the spin you need only to change one thing. :: Christina Baldwin

♥ You have to look for the joy. Look for the light of God that is hitting your life, and you will find sparkles you didn't know were there.

♥ Be the change you wish to see in the world... :: Gandhi

♥ Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

♥ We each have only a limited amount of time here. We have to do more with it - pay attention, explore, be open to all of life. Because we have only one chance, we have to make life seem longer than it really is. :: Viggo Mortensen

♥ Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible. :: Cadet Maxim

♥ Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore! Dream! Discover!

♥ What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail? :: Unknown

♥ To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. :: David Viscott, M.D

♥ Right now it feels like:...no dream will ever remain unfulfilled...no desire will ever remain unanswered...no tear goes unnoticed and no effort wasted...the hills are alive and so are we...each moment is fresh and waiting to happen...and there will be garbage like situations all around...but it is upto us to light mud lamps in it...and glow in our own acceptance and appreciations... :: Anu

♥ I struggle with not feeling like I'm good enough at times. Usually, its because I'm pushing it too hard and have depleted my reserve. Yet, I know without a shadow of a doubt that no matter how heavy or thin, how young or old I appear to others it's what I feel on the inside that glows through. If I could give every person on this planet just one gift it would be the unwavering knowledge that they are beautiful and worthy of every good thing the universe holds. :: CeeCi

♥ It's easier to buy into the negative things we conjure about ourselves than the positive things. Knowing that is the first step towards changing the thoughts that keep us unhappy. With time moving forward, why stay trapped in the past? All we have is right here and right now, I intend to make the most of it! :: CeeCi